Merry Christmas! Oh wait...

I wanted to post this picture from Friday... it's not an amazing picture, but I took it with my phone while I was out on a little bike ride because the goats and cows were out, and that means spring is here.  It was 75 degrees and sunny (and that was 3 days ago!).

This picture, on the other hand, is what it looked like out my window this morning!  It was 35 degrees and snowing!  I think I was the only person on campus who was excited about it.  I might have eaten a candy cane and sang Christmas music today...

This week is our last week of classes before finals week!  I can count the days until I go home on my fingers now.  That makes me happy.  Besides that, I am hanging in there.  I can't sleep much because my bladder always feels uncomfortable.  Apparently, overactive bladder medicine isn't what it needed, because it doesn't feel any better and I've been on it for quite awhile.  We're going to take care of that issue when I get home.  Not sleeping enough doesn't make it any easier to deal with the fever and everything else, but I just need to make it through 10 more days!

Easter break.

I am home for Easter and I'm getting some much needed rest.  I've been too sick to do much besides sleep since I've been home, which has been really hard for me.  I'm trying to remember that getting through a year of school while being sick is a big deal, and that I need to rest during this break anyways so that I'll have enough energy to get through the last 4 weeks of school... yet I'm still good at starting to think that I'm just a boring, lazy bum.  Chronic illnesses are just so weird and long and sometimes boring... but, they are also a brilliant way for God to teach me things that I probably wouldn't have learned any other way.

I've heard it said that when people are sick for a very long time, they can start to grow bitter.  I've met bitter people, but I've also met some ridiculously awesome, joyful people who have been through enough to make even the happiest, optimistic person become bitter... yet they're still joyful.  Those are my favorite people, because it's obvious where they get their joy from.  Being sick has taught me that joy, peace and faith are so much more than feelings, and that if I ask God for them, God does something really cool.  He just dishes them out to me like it's what He's been waiting for me to ask Him for ages.  Sometimes I have to keep asking God for the fruits of the spirit throughout the day because each struggle that I go through every day can drain me of anything good if I let it... but, each struggle can also be used as a way for God to teach me more about Him and the person that He's molding me into, if I let it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a fan of being sick. The past few weeks have been especially hard because of how tired I am.  I can't explain how sick I am of this fever.  I think people forget that I have a fever sometimes, and that when you have a fever, well... it's not always easy to think straight, or to hold a conversation, or to just stay awake in general.  I just always enjoy time to think and reflect, because then I have time to see a tiny glimpse of what God's been up to.  And He's been up to a lot.
 
"That is what mortals misunderstand. They say of temporal suffering, 'no future bliss can make up for it,' not knowing that Heaven, once attained, will work backwards and turn even that agony into a glory."
-C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce

(It took me a few days to get this posted, because I've only been able to write little bits at a time... so I didn't know it was going to be the day before Easter... so... Happy Easter!!!!  Christ has risen, and that's something to be joyful about!)