Back to school!

This week was my first week of classes since I left on medical leave last October!  I moved in last Saturday, and classes started Monday.  It was really hard to make the transition from the clinic to school at first.  8 days felt like forever at the clinic, and I didn't know it'd be so hard to go from being surrounded by very sick people to healthy college kids again.  However, I've never been so thankful for having so many awesome people around me!  Some of my favorite people on campus are the maintenance people.  I got to know them really well from my summer that I spent here on the paint crew, and they all stop to ask how I'm doing whenever they see me walking around campus.  I also got a hug from one of the ladies who swipes our cards every day at the dining hall... it made my day.  Even the guy who fills the salad bar said "Hey! You're back!"  There are plenty of helpful people around campus and I'm so grateful for that.  I also ended up in a dorm room right next to some of my friends, and we didn't even plan it! 

Of course, there are still some incredibly hard parts about being back at school.  My fever has been kicking my butt and I've become quite the insomniac.  I lay in bed for 8.5 hours every night, yet I hardly sleep at all.  Sometimes it's because I'm in pain, but sometimes I just lay awake for no reason.  I'm really hoping that will get better soon... because it makes me feel like I'm walking around in a daze all of the time.  I'm only taking 4 classes and a lab this semester, so I'm staying on top of homework seeing as I never know when I'll be feeling very sick and won't be able to do it.  I'm also still on the cross country team.  Sometimes I get very discouraged when I'm there because I'm around so many very healthy, fit people and I guess it just really makes me realize what I can't do because of my illness.  I have to always remind myself that it's about what God's doing through it, not what I'm not doing.  My coach has me helping out with the "club team," which is something that is brand new this year.  Helping out the runners (especially when they're discouraged and I get to encourage them) makes things better.  I guess my ridiculous amount of experience in being discouraged can actually be a good thing sometimes.

I still have lots of ups and downs, but I know that God has brought me here and that things really are going to be okay.  Not to say I don't get sad that I'm still sick, because I do... but that just reminds that I don't have to try to be strong enough to do this on my own, because God will give me all the strength that I need... one step at a time...