In the Pit.

"I waited patiently for the Lord;

he inclined to me and heard my cry.

He drew me up from the desolate pit,

out of the miry bog,

and set  my feet upon a rock,

making my steps secure.

He put a new song in my mouth,

a song of praise to our God.

Many will see and fear,

and put their trust in the Lord."

~Psalm 40: 1-3 (NRSV)

The term "pit" is found in the Psalms and the book of Job a lot.  When people fall into a "pit" in their lives, it feels like everything is falling part.  It makes me feel much better knowing that there are a ton of lament psalms that I can relate to (Psalm 6!), especially when things seem to really stink.  Things just seem to be getting more difficult everyday, but... not everything is terrible.  I'm trying very hard to focus on the things that I can do and the people that I can help while I'm in this situation... and to do those things prayerfully and meaningfully.  That's really the only way I can get through this.  Whether it's swimming, helping a friend, reading, spending time with my parents, playing music, or even... RESTING... I'm trying to be very focused on how that can help others and myself... and especially my relationship with God.  Playing music has always been one of my favorite stress relievers.  Speaking of music, I've also found myself in another pit... the Pit Orchestra for my high school's musical!  It just so happened that they didn't have a french horn player, so I'm taking a trip back in time to high school to play with them.  It's very exhausting (I was in it my senior year in hs), and I was freaking out before I went to rehearsal last week because I didn't know if I could handle it... but, once I was given a french horn to play, I was very, very happy and I decided that I could make it through 2 hours of rehearsal before I went home and collapsed on the couch.  The band director knows that I'm sick, so he's being very lenient with me and letting me skip rehearsals when I need to.  And I thought I'd never have the chance to play french horn again... how cool.

I can't wait until the day that I can sing that "new song" in Psalm 40, but... God's giving me what I need, even when I'm in that yucky pit.  I just need to keep trusting Him.